Ben Oliver

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Moonfall

The moon is going to help us.
07 September 2022

The Moon is falling to Earth. Patrick Wilson and Halle Berry fly up there to figure out what’s going on before it hits us.

A classic disaster movie made in a time when no-one wants a classic disaster movie. It’s the same old shit it ever was; the world is under threat, the hero is a washed up guy no one wants to deal with, he’s lost touch with his son, but he’s the only guy who can save us etc…

The key to the story here is that the moon is going to hit the Earth, and as it approches Earth it starts fucking with gravity and the tides. That’s just about enough to keep the film going so it’s a real surprise when they completely derail it in one of the most offensively stupid final acts I can recall ever seeing in a film. It completely ceases to make any sense on a level I can’t even begin to explain.

It’s tired old nonsense jammed with product placement, pandering to the Chinese and a terrible, terrible script. Almost “so bad it’s good” territory, and probably enough to kill off the genre once and for all.